Mood:
mischieviousNow Playing: George Michael -- Freedom
Topic: Uche, the idiotic scammer
For those of you who haven't been keeping up, "Gavin Brown" is the account manager for the supposed motherless babies home. This is the email that I received from him last week...
From : lawrence joe
Sent : Thursday, March 11, 2004 11:16 AM
To : loveshoe@hotmail.com
Subject : Lawrencejoe Orphanage
Hello Jenny,
I know you will ask your self how do we get our E-mail
(Yes, I was actually wondering how you get your email!)
Mr Uche Chima gave also your E-mail that you will like to donate to the homes which is well come.
(Now it's more than one home or just bad English?)
You can send the funds to this information below by estern union money transfer today and the information are:
(Today? Demanding, isn't he?)
MR GAVIN BROWN (Wait... I thought this email was from Lawrence Joe? Aww, who cares?)
43 Prince Charles Crescent
Malinslee
Telford
TF3 2JY
UK
As soon as the money is transfer Via western union money transfer i will need the following information from you to collect the funds here, and they are:
SENDER'S NAME/ADDRESS:
RECEIVER'S NAME:
(Wouldn't you already have the receiver's name? Or you just have so many identities you have to remember which one to use!!)
TEST QUESTION AND ANSWER:
MCTN (CONTROL NUMBER):
As soon as will collect the funds a letter of thanks will be send to you from the homes to say thnaks for the help.
(So nice of them, isn't it?)
And the children we appericate all you have done for them for a long time, because Mr Uche Chima is doing the same for us right now.
(Mr. Uche Chima is such a nice guy, isn't he?)
Do get back at us.
(Oh, I will... and I am!!)
WITH LOVE FROM THE HOMES AND THE CHILDREN WE WELCOME YOU.
Regards,
Gavin Brown
Account Manager
Lawrence orhanage. (Was that Lawrence orphanage or Lawrencejoe orphanage??)
Now it's my turn!!! :)
Hello Mr. Brown,
I am incredibly sorry that it has taken me such a long time to respond to you. As Uche can tell you, I have been dreadfully sick for the past week. I fell ill after eating a tainted egg and ended up in the hospital over the weekend. Today is my first day back to work and let me tell you, it has not been pleasant. I have been running to and from the bathroom all day...my co-workers will not go near the toilet. This morning I didn't quite make it to the restroom and had quite an embarrassment pooping my pants. Can you relate to that experience? But that's enough about me; I am here to ask you about your sweet yummy babies and how I can help them. Where in London are you located, might I ask? I am planning a trip to the UK this summer and would love to see the children that I've helped. If that is not a possibility, would you be able to send me some pictures of them? I am also interested in adopting... my ideal child would have yellow eyes and red hair. I would love to send the sweet babies money through Western Union, but there are two problems: 1. The nearest Western Union is an hour away and 2. I need a receipt for my taxes. Is this contribution tax deductible? So I would prefer to send you a check. Could I send you a check to the 43 Prince Charles Crescent address? Is there an address for the orphanage so that I can send them cards? I would love to send the children cards - and chicken gizzards! I feed them to my ferrets, did Uche tell you that I have ferrets? I bet the children would like to play with them... perhaps I can bring them with me on my trip for the children to play with. After the UK I am planning to travel to Nigeria to visit some relatives, they live in Lagos, have you heard of it?
I forgot to ask, who at the orphanage will be receiving the Ferrari that I'm selling? I'm sorry to ramble on so long, but I don't have very many people to talk to. Well, it's time to go to the lavatory again, I'm afraid. I hope that I make it this time! I'm looking forward to speaking with you very soon.
Yours truly,
Jenny
P.S. Could you put in a good word about me to Uche, I find his generosity attractive and I'm wondering if he is married or dating anyone?
*sigh* I will be so bored when he stops playing!
posted by a cautiously optimistic Redskins fan
at 3:51 PM EST
Updated: Wednesday, March 24, 2004 4:43 PM EST
